Saturday, January 23, 2010

The meaning of a hug: becoming sisters

Every day Ellie greets Nina in the morning with a smile and a sweet, "Hi Nina!" She goes to her and tries to give her a hug. Every day Nina pushes Ellie away and says, "No."

Ellie's little heart has been broken every day. She is rejected by her new sister, the sister that she so desperately wants to love. One that she dreams will be her best friend but instead pushes her away. It happens a few times a day, and rejection sends her into sad tears. "Why won't Nina love me?" And all we can do is hug Ellie, kiss her, and assure her that someday, Nina will hug her too, that someday, they really will be great friends.

Wednesday night church activities were cancelled due to weather. It was great having Andy home that evening and for all of us to be together, playing, laughing, being a family.

Nina looked at Ellie, she smiled. Then it happened, Nina threw her arms around Ellie and pulled her close. Ellie wrapped her arms around Nina and looked at Andy and me. It started to come, slowly. From deep inside her they burst, the giggles, the excitement. She held Nina close and giggled and laughed, giggled and laughed, it was pure bliss!

Andy and I looked at each other, we started to giggle too. What was happening before us was so meaningful, so deep. This is what Ellie had been waiting for, this was a wonderful step towards their friendships, towards becoming sisters.

They hugged for a long time.

Then Nina hugged Andy, and she hugged me. She looked at all of us with a smile (Nichole does not want Nina to hug her quite yet.)

Maybe Nina is finally getting it, maybe she realizes that what she has now is full of love and a promise of forever.

We are becoming a family, Ellie and Nina are becoming sisters. It is a beautiful dance to watch and be a part of.


  1. I'm sitting here crying. This makes me happy, so I can't imagine how it feels at your house. : )

  2. OK now I'm crying too! Absolutely the most wonderful thing I've heard all day :).

  3. maia is the reason we finally looked to adopt again. she asked every day since she could talk when is she goingto get a baby sister. and then Sophie came home and would not even give her the time of day. would not talk to her look at her be affectionate with her. And all Maia wanted was to love on that girl. I couldnt keep Maia from hugging her but I taught her "drive by" hug. quick hug and keep on going. this way sophie doesnt have time to reject and maia still gets her hug. but its still so early days, dont worry it will get better. I cant count how many times I have recently found maia in the crib with Sophie and they are giggling and messing around. it took a awhile but they are best buds now. sophie and ben and maia are like 3 muskateers most the time. remember they have only been home about 4 months. hang in there mama! these kids just dont know what a loving family IS and what a loving family DOES. but once they catch on they thrive!

  4. That is just so wonderful. It has to be amazing to watch the changes in Nina as she learns to how to be part of a loving family.

  5. absolutely amazing!! gives me chills :) I hope our littles hug :)
    so so sweet....

  6. Anonymous11:11 PM

    What a beautiful moment that will always remain in your memory. Thank you for sharing it :)

  7. So sweet!

    Today at lunch the kids were sitting at the table and Ana looked over at me in the kitchen and said, "ah luh loo". I know what you mean, each of those steps- when they choose without being prompted for the first time, it's a very special moment.

    I'm excited for Ellie! And I'm excited for Nina too.

  8. Awesome!!!:) Glad to miss church for this!

  9. Anonymous7:18 AM

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  10. Anonymous12:06 PM

    What a precious story! God bless you and your family as you strive to raise your girls to love the Lord.


  11. I'm crying, too! What a Beautiful Gift for Miss Ellie...and Miss Nina, as well! I am SO happy for you all!
    Peace and Love ~ Jo

  12. With us for some reason it was the opposite. Laurel (our adopted daughter) wanted to hug our biological son all the time. I mean in his personal space hug. He would push her away and say "no Laurel". FINALLY we are seeing him run up to her and hug and they too resolve into giggles. I cry everytime. It is so wonderful when they finally start seeing each other as family. Makes it all worth it.


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