Responding to Your Comments #4...and a picture!

My friend Melissa came to visit a couple of months ago with her camera. Melissa is a gifted photographer, speaker, and singer. She is involved in Children's ministry and helps churches figure out what is best for their programs.Yes, she is really amazing and she is beautiful. Also, she is single. So for you single men, Miss Mel is available, but you will have to pass many of her friend's approval first. Okay, that's that about Miss Mel. I forgot bout this picture until I saw it today as Andy's screen saver. I love this picture and I had to share!

On to your comments...

Blog post: Christmas Memories in Which...

In this post I asked about protecting your photos from being copied and stolen, and this are a couple of ideas:

There is an html code that you can add to the

There are really simple plugins that enable you to prevent people from copying text and images. It also disables right clicking.
Look in the add-ons section for "blog protector" or "disable right click" and you should find an add-on.

Let's pretend I am really not great with computer, and let's pretend I need step by step, clear, specific directions...okay, let's not pretend!

Blog post: My Favorite Posts of 2011

Wow, you have really had an amazing year!
Stopped by from Kasey's blog - she mentioned you today :-)

Thanks Kasey! Now it is my turn. Kasey writes beautiful devotionals and shares about what God is doing in her heart. Right now she is having a Kindle 3G giveaway! All you have to do is leave a comment on one of her posts for an entry. And for a second entry you just have to spread the word about the giveaway. Pretty sweet huh? Go check out her blog!

Blog post: Meant to be Together

As we are at the beginning of this journey, it is always reassuring to know that others have been where I am now and have lived to tell about it. :) Love is a process. And sometimes it is a difficult process.

Bless you for your honesty and obedience. We're usually called to those actions before we feel the happy, warm fuzzy feelings.

This is a courageous and needed post...
We've been down the adoption road twice and it is such. a. hard. road.
I love that this shares the process of growing love...to me that is even more beautiful.

The fact that I did not feel love for Nina for months after being home made me feel very guilty. Like something was wrong with me. The worst part, is that I felt so alone in the journey. I was afraid to tell other people how I really felt. But when I finally did, when I reached out to a friend that had adopted too, I realized that I was not alone. I was able to honestly share all that was inside of me, and God began to heal my heart. He grew that love! As I continued to talk to other adoptive parents, I came to refer to this as "adoption's greatest kept secret" and realize how common this is. Not for all, but some of us take time to get there. I also believe it is so important that we talk truthfully about our experiences so that we can reach out to other people that are going through the same situations we are too. If I do not share my struggles truthfully, how can I expect others to share truthfully with me?

Our newest little grandson (3 months) was born with Down's and he's a perfect addition to our family.

Congratulations! He will continue to bless your family. Yes, he is a perfect gift!

Blog post: CP Connection #2

We had our second CP Connection. Bloggers that write about Cerebral palsy coming together and sharing their lives. If you write about CP, have a child with CP, or are an adult with CP, please join us! Every first of the month we will be joining together and "blog hoping" to visit one another so we can learn. the link is open for the month. If you have not had a chance to visit the blogs that are linked, you can visit them now!

In Which...I Forgot

On my last post I which I listed some Christmas memories, I mistakenly omitted some photos. Actually, I simply forgot I had more pictures until I downloaded the pictures into my laptop last night.

So here it goes, these are some more memories from Christmas time when Andy's family was here.

9. In which we went to the light display and it was awesome and it included a scene from Holland.

10. In which grandpa makes malts for the family (except the lady with the stomach flu, which would be me)

11. In which grandpa tells the greatest stories and the girls listen intently.

 

12. In which Nichole wants to lay on grandpa and grandma's bed to talk, play, and tickle.

Book Review: The Skin Map by Stephen Lawhead

I will begin by giving you the book description from Thomas Nelson Publishers:

"I need your help with a project. It will be the adventure of a lifetime—of several lifetimes. But it will change you forever."

Kit Livingston's great-grandfather appears in a deserted alley during a tumultuous storm. He reveals an unbelievable story: ley lines throughout Britain are not merely the stuff of legend or the weekend hobby of deluded cranks—they're pathways to other worlds. To those who know how to use them, ley lines grant the ability to travel the multi-layered universe of which we ordinarily inhabit only a tiny part.

One explorer knew more than most. Braving every danger, he toured both time and space on voyages of heroic discovery. Ever on his guard, and fearful of becoming lost in the cosmos, he developed an intricate code—a roadmap of symbols—that he tattooed onto his own body. This Skin Map has since been lost in time. Now the race is on to recover all the pieces and discover its secrets.

The Bright Empires series is a unique blend of epic treasure hunt, ancient history, alternate realities, cutting-edge physics, philosophy, and mystery.

My husband is a fan of Stephen Lawhead. For years, when I have been looking for something to read, he has suggested I pick up one of Lawhead's books. When "The Skin Map" was given as a choice for a review, I figured if anything my husband would be glad to have it.

After one book, I believe I have become a fan.

About the author: Stephen Lawhead is a master storyteller. The way he uses words in his descriptions, dialogue and action are superb. I found myself reading some of his sentences twice, just for the pleasure of a well written sentence.

About the book: I don't think I could make this book enough justice, so here is a short, general overview.The story in itself is an engaging adventure. It takes place across time and dimensions. It offers nuggets of history and customs that are fascinating. More specifically, the good guys and bad guys are after the skin map in order to understand the intricacies of ley travel. While we see their stories unfold, we also learn about the man who was map and his journey.

About the characters: Ah! This is my favorite part about books, the characters! Our man, Kit, is not a hero. He is an insecure, directionless, bored young man trying to figure out what to do about life. When his great-grandfather, Cosimo, offers the adventure of a lifetime, Kit joins in yet continues to be a stand-bier. Kit's girlfriend, Mina, is a depressed, tired, unattractive woman who works as a baker. In Kit's desperate attempt to get Mina to believe his story of ley travel, Kit takes Mina to a ley line, where unfortunately, they are separated and land in different times and places. Contrary to Kit, Mina rises above her circumstances and well...I will not spoil the story for you. Kit and his companions are trying to find the skin map in order to find Mina, and what unfolds in between is an energizing adventure.

Lastly, I do believe this book would make a great movie! The story is strong, and the characters are simply outstanding!

So if you are looking for a fantasy/adventure book to read, grab "The Skin Map." It will not disappoint!

I received this book for free by Thomas Nelson publishing through the Booksneeze team in exchange for my honest review.

The Same Team (Recycled Post)

 Photo Credit

It has been a productive morning. The pile of dirty laundry is now a pile of clean laundry. The breakfast dishes have been loaded in the dishwasher, and dinner is cooking in the Crockpot. Even better, I took a shower and got dressed before noon.

While the girls play nicely in the living room, I pick up the phone to call a friend. “Hi Kezia, I was calling to ask about…” I hear a scream. I turn around and two of the girls are fighting over a toy. While the tug of war unfolds, Barbie, who has been “jumping” in her dance class with my third child accidentally pokes the eye of her owner. An unfortunate event that sends her into a high pitch cry. All of this happens in a matter of seconds.

“I will have to call you later” I hang up the phone.

By lunch time, two of the girls have been in the naughty corner a couple of times. One has been sent to her room, and I have heard the phrase “It is not fair” more times than I can count. I admit I have wanted to say those same words using my outside voice a couple of times too.

When my husband arrives home, it is evident that we have had a tiring couple of hours. I am presently warning one of the girls, “If you take that from your sister one more time, you will go back to the naughty corner!”

“What is going on?” he asks

“It is pretty obvious, don’t you think!” I snap at him. As soon as the words leave my mouth, I know they are unkind. With my attitude, I take my frustration on him and fight him too.

“Honey” he gently says, “We are on the same team.”

His words touch the chaos in my heart. I don’t have to fight. I am not alone in this parenting adventure, I have a team mate, a soul mate, and a friend.

I take a deep breath.

“We are on the same team” I repeat, “I need help on this one or I will scream”

He takes over with the girls, who are excited daddy is home for lunch, and after a few minutes they are happy rolling on the floor with daddy. In the kitchen, I make peanut butter and jelly sandwiches.

Later that day, when the girls go to bed, Andy and I sit down with a cup of decaffeinated coffee and talk about our day.

We talk about being in the same team.

Sometimes it is easy to allow the tensions of life to pull us apart. It is easier to “survive” a day, rather than live it. The truth is, when I am only surviving, I have little time to stop and “gather around” to play as a team.

When our girls see that mommy and daddy are united, that they are a team, they feel secure. Mommy is not snapping at daddy, but rather asking for backup. Mommy is not going at it alone, but has a strong partner beside her.

Sometimes team members get crabby, sometimes team members do not pull their part. But we are still a team, we still play together. If one of the girls asks for something, we respond, “What did mommy say?” or “What did daddy say?” We don’t challenge or diminish each other’s parenting styles in front of the children. When tension rises and we have to play hard, we stay as a team, and we try to work together. When things go well, we can celebrate.

We sip some more coffee and smile as we look back at the day. Some days are harder than other days, and some days I chose to go at it alone. Those are the days I feel defeated. But we played well today and our friendship is strengthened because we are on the same team.


Linked to:
No Ordinary Blog Hop
Women Living Well
Word Filled Wednesday
Works for me Wednesday
Winsome Wednesday
A Holy Experience
On Your Heart Tuesday
Soli Deo Gloria
Teach Me Tuesday

Christmas Memories In Which...

It was a first for our family as we got to host Christmas with both my family, and Andy's family. We had a wonderful time. Times like this remind me that I wish our families lived closer.

These are some of my favorite memories:

1. In which we made gingerbread houses. My sisters helped Ellie and Nina and they turned our pretty cute.

Nina loved eating the frosting mostly, but Ellie had a great time being creative.

2. In which Ellie's gingerbread house turns out great. I spend hours peeling potatoes, resulting in several days where mashed potatoes were the main dish. My sister Luisa plays Andy's guitar. The newlyweds spend their first Christmas together.

3. In which Nichole was really excited when my mom and sisters arrived at our house; for hours, Nichole hugged, kissed, and played with my mom. The weather is so nice that my mom and step-dad went out for a walk. Nichole got "The Heffalump" movie and stuffed toy for Christmas, making it the best Christmas present.

 4. In which my sister Luisa was the most popular girl in the house. Ellie thinks Luisa is the greatest human being in the universe.

5. In which I got to love on my girls.

6. In which our family spent time together. And we note that the men do not speak Spanish, so my mom, sisters, and I can talk behind their backs...if we wanted to.

7. In which Andy's parents and sister (with her family) came to celebrate Christmas during New Year's. When the girls get to play with cousins, and where we fought the stomach flu, so there were less pictures.

8. In which Nichole was too cute not to snap picture after picture of her.

What are your favorite Christmas memories?

And, do you know how to make your pictures so that nobody can click on them and copy them? Is there a better way to copyright them?

My Favorite Posts of 2011

Photo Credit

Amazing how fast a year goes by, but then you look back and realize that much has happened. I would describe 2011 as a year of transition. It started with great discouragement as we were unsure what was next for our family (a process that had begun since September of 2010). In March we candidated at a church (my husband is a pastor, in case you didn't know) and we accepted the new position. Andy finished as the associate pastor in our former church in April, and a few days later Nina was having major spinal surgery. We moved in late May and the girls began school (all of them) in September. Throw in there trips, family gatherings, my sister's wedding, life and oh boy...that was a lot in such little time!

In light of that, I thought I would share my favorite posts from the year. You can click on the title and it will take you to the post.

January

Nina's Anniversary: This was after one year of Nina being home.

February

Becoming Your Child's Advocate: I still have much to learn about how to be an effective advocate for my girls, but more and more I learn how to do it appropriately and with good results, keeping the passion and emotion under control.

She Is Not a Baby, Treat Her Like a Big Girl: I have much to learn about Cerebral Palsy, but many times I am Nina's greatest challenge to overcome as I do too much for her.

Turning 30: What else can I say, my reflections on a "milestone" age.

March

Why Adopt a Child With Cerebral Palsy: Self explanatory

A Season of Lent: This is where I share my heart about wanting to live my life to honor God. it is not about Lent, but rather this relationship I have with my Savior, and how much more I want to know Him.

Down Syndrome Has Changed Me: This is a personal letter I wrote to my daughter Nichole.

What Did He Say?: Before her surgery, Nina took a class at the hospital to know what to expect. In this class she was given a stethoscope to play with and she listened intently. Nina shared with us the doctor and me what she had heard, her message from Jesus.

April

All of April is about Nina's Cerebral Palsy, her surgery, recovery, and such!

May

Adventures in Moving: Moving with 3 girls ages 5 and under, 2 of them with special needs, was quite the adventure!

June

The Same Team: One of my very favorites! It was a rejected article for a magazine but I still wanted to share it. it is about marriage and working together when you have little kids.

July

Nina's Best Friend: We got to meet Nina's bets friend from the orphanage, Oksana, and her family. They have become such dear friends!

August

We were transitioning in the new place.

Septemeber

The Brodys In This World: The story of a young man with Cerebral Palsy from our church.

Brody's Light: A touching follow up story to my first post about Brody and how he is sharing God's word.

Down Syndrome and Abortion: An honest post where I speak to the women that have had an abortion, and those considering one based on a diagnosis on Down syndrome. Possibly this post has been shared and read more than any other post or article I have ever written.

Could I Do More?: A common mothering question, but when you have children with special needs, this is an even greater "fear."

October

Road Marker 321: If you only read one post, read this one. I spent the month of October and most of November sharing about our journey as our daughter was born with Down syndrome. This is the first of 24 posts, the "prologue." And the most intimate piece of writing I have ever written.

November

Two Years Ago, Why We Adopted: Top 10 reasons why we adopted.

This Man: The love, respect, and admiration I have for my husband.

Why Moms Need Friends: Top 10 reasons why moms need friends.

December

Christmas, Presents, Lights, and All That Matters: Self-explanatory in top 10 style.

A Hope and a Future: What Nina's future holds because she has a family and is an orphan no more.

First Steps Take Courage: contrasting my 3 girls and what their first steps defined.

Live With Us Forever?: My take on the possibility of having my child with Down syndrome live with me forever.

Okay, I know that you won't click on every single link, but, did you have a favorite post here?

Also, do you have a  favorite post from your blog? Share it with me so I can stop by and visit for a while!

Meant to Be Together

It was past 8:00 pm on December 31^st 2009 when Nina and I landed in the Minneapolis airport. A wheelchair greeted us as a man held a sign that read “Stumbo.” His surprise showed as I placed a sleeping Nina on the wheelchair with no other explanation as of why a child would require the service, but rather a, “Get me out of here as quickly as you can please, I prefer running.” He could see in my eyes that I had been crying.

He didn’t run, but he did rush us through the airport straight to those blessed doors that led to baggage claim…and the rest of my family. I spotted Andy right away, but he was expecting us to come out the same doors the rest of my flight companions would be exiting from. I did not have the mind to think of what was socially acceptable, or what would be an embarrassing moment. I yelled his name and began running towards him, “Andy! Honey! I am here!” Running, and hoping that the man pushing Nina would follow me. Ellie saw me first and ran to me. We held tight as we said how much we had missed each other, how long 7 weeks had been. Andy walked with Nichole sleeping on his chest, but as soon as we embraced, we began sobbing. It had been a long emotional journey, the adoption process had been so hard, but we were finally together.

Nina woke up and sat scared on the wheelchair. All the people around her were strange and different. When we buckled her in the car seat she lost it, and her coping mechanism was to go into a deep sleep until the following day.

It was the morning of January 1^st 2010 that we all woke up together. All 5 of us; a new year and a new beginning for our family. That was 2 years ago.

Two years.

Adoption was hard. Really hard. 

Some people talk about meeting their adopted child and immediately falling in love. They talk about how they love them no different from their biological children, and how easy the transition was in becoming a family. 

I did not immediately fall in love with Nina loving her the same as my other 2 girls, and our transition took a very long time. 

We have worked very hard at building this love. She has been challenging and frustrating more times than I can count. We have tackled behaviors and emotional issues that have made me feel like the biggest failure of a mother and helpless. But we keep at it, we keep working, we keep trying, and we keep loving.  She has taught me more about unconditional love than anyone else has in my lifetime.

Moreover, she has been delightful, tenacious, courageous, and strong!

And she has been my inspiration…more times than I can count too.

Two years.

She is my own. I am her mother, she is my daughter. We keep chugging along, tackling whatever comes our way. Whether it is bonding, walking, Cerebral Palsy, learning, or enjoying life. We keep at it, we keep on going.

One thing I know for sure after these 2 years:  we were meant to be together, always were.


Linked to:
Soli Deo Gloria
Teach Me Tuesday
On Your Heart Tuesday
Titus Tuesday
No Ordinary Blog Hop
On, In, and Around Monday
Playdates